presence

4-8-21

Experiencing strong emotions today,

Rising anger and deep fear.

Anger is always about the past,

And fear is about the future.

The rainy morning is helpful, I find myself alone.

With no distractions, I find my way back: back to this moment.

It is in this moment a worried mind and a troubled heart finds peace.

Grateful today for choices, to return to my own breath.

4-11-21

Growth and decay, Inspiration and emptiness.

When I loose my balance, it is because my view is too small.

All things rise and fall, everything is in rhythm.

My opinions are not needed, I am allowed to observe this short time.

I can make nothing better, not even me.

Today I am alive, and life is eternal.

Tomorrow I will be dead, and death is eternal.

All things come, all things go.

The glorious reality of this.

4-5-21

There is more to this than time and distance,

There is more to us than flesh and bone.

When I try too hard I create resistance,

When I control too much I end up alone.

Giving up the old ways is never easy,

Shame and fear is safer than risk and trust.

But life’s an adventure, and always remember-

In the end it’s all dust to dust.

THE TUESDAY NIGHT

Seeing myself in everyone I meet, I seek out those who are like me.

Then you walked in – unannounced, unexpected, unwanted.

When you said your name, I knew you even less

But I heard you for the first time.

You were hard to look at, and even harder to see.

You are not here to be looked at, you are not here to be heard.

You are here to be known.

You don’t live life – you burn it –

You have consumed me and I will never let you go.

You are what I won’t let myself be.

You are purpose and balance in this holy mystery.

2-28-21

Perfect love and perfect death now come to my perfect life.

How wonderful to be here, to loose the moments, they slowly pass.

The whites are graying and the grays darken.

I love being here, I love this experience.

To be dying without resistance.

Soon enough the fight for life will return-

So I am grateful for this moment, it is what I needed to learn.

3-11-21

How quickly I seem to get lost inside myself.

I feel so confused, so unable to touch the moment.

I don’t see the beauty, I only see the sameness.

I don’t see the truth, I only see the emptiness.

How quickly inspiration dissolves into the ordinary.

It is the ordinary days, that I learn patience and acceptance.

It is the ordinary days, that I learn to smile, and to wave.

It is the ordinary days that I learn to share more with others.

My soul is my own, but my life should be shared.

2-21-21

To experience that wonderful stillness that only

Winter mornings can provide.

My life gets so much better

When I take myself outside.

To be present in this moment

There is nothing else to be.

I close my eyes, I take a breath.

Become the stillness that is me.

2-21-21

We are here to seek beauty,

We are here the truth to know,

We are here to spread the love we have,

And that is how we grow

What a wonderful chance we have to share each others pain;

To laugh together in the shining sun

And in the pouring rain.

And when you are asked to sing, sing like you belong.

Your truth and your beauty are best expressed when in a song.

And please remember to join with us whenever you get the chance,

To imitate the stars above, to wink, to shine, to dance.

2-14-21

Everyday, anyhow, anyway I must find beauty.

That is my job, that is my responsibility.

I must never be too busy, I must never be too depressed.

The beauty is always there, if only to the seeker.

This morning it was 5 below, so I bundled up and went for a walk.

After discussing my madness with myself for about 30 minutes,

As I was coming in I saw the eastern sky.

The purple, the gold, the gray, and then silence perfected the moment.

Madness dissolves when it encounters beauty.

1-24-21

The sky will change it’s colors many times today.

Many lives will begin and many lives will end today.

My thinking will inspire and depress me today.

My world will expand and reduce today.

My body will generate and decay today.

I will find peace and I will find conflict today.

And as always the ever-changing universe will be perfect today.

12-31-20

Sometimes I feel so empty inside.

I feel like I have lost myself.

I know why people bleed just to see if they are still alive.

My days have become quieter, emptier, my inspiration used up.

Lost and disconnected from myself, I look to others for support.

Finding none, I despair.

This: Yes this is the road I have been looking for:

To make peace with my own despair.

It has been here for a while now, but I have been afraid to look.

It is really not so bad – despair, just another part of me.

The colors of dawn arrive now, the sun will follow.

It will not ask how I am,

It will shine for all, without distinction.

Learning today about the changes that are upon us.

Seeing people with my mind’s eye, because we cannot be together.

Seeing the faces of people, missing them, loving them, everyone I know.

Not being in love with them, but loving them.

It is one of the most pleasant feelings I’ve ever had.

Missing people and loving them all equally,

Not loosing myself by falling in love.

Knowing I can love people I am not in love with.

12-20-20

When I am alone outside walking or just sitting in a natural setting, being alone

feels so right. And when I am alone at home it feels so wrong; I should do

something, get busy, shame on you. I can always find a way to be ashamed of

myself. I still don’t know if I am lying or telling the truth. I still don’t know

what I am seeking or why. And yet it is these moments that are most familiar,

it is these moments that are most natural. Shame and pride are only words, they

have no meaning in the natural world. There is nothing to gain, nothing to loose.

This is just a quiet journey into reality and back again. I get to see there is nothing

wrong in God’s Universe, it is only man who makes it so.