12-11-22

Today, what will be my place in the world

Stillness is desired, but I am uncomfortable in it’s presence.

I want relationship.

When I am in relationship, I must get out to find stillness.

When I am alone with stillness, I must create or seek relationship.

As I stay with myself, I realize I can lay the conflict aside for a moment.

I can be grateful that I can make choices, and no choice is permanent.

More at peace now, ok with stillness.

Happy to stay until I choose to leave.

Seeing how in relationship I seek approval, in stillness I seek creativity.

My first reaction to both states is self-centered, and ego driven-

Creating my discomfort.

Becoming less afraid of relationships, less afraid of stillness.

Relationships and creativity are gifts, I don’t control them.

Let me be grateful when they are present, let me be grateful when they are not.